If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
