it wasn't lemon gatorade
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just found puke in my bra..
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
