Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Do vagina's smell?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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