Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
All the doctor said was why
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize