but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize