I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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