obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize