I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
