It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
