i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
