but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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