Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
