would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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