You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
