We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
