is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize