At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Randomize
