drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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