If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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