D3 body, D1 cock
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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