they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Randomize
