whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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