question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
