please come you make the beer taste better
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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