i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
