any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm always down for nudity.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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