He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
