Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
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the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
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He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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