Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
