ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
