But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
