this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize