No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
