I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
