I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
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High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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