i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
