Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
