last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
