I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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