you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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