I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
