Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
