Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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