We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
