Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
