Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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