You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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