I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
