What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I lost the right to judge tonight
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
