i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
