Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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