Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Sacagawea was the original milf.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
