Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
