Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I'm having to shit out rocks
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